April’s Fools
Dated: 12 April 2026
Greetings, dear listeners of the realm,
Your humble scribe returns a bit earlier in the month than planned. It seems there has been quite a stir in the realm lately, and I wanted to discuss it before the rumors being spread fully take over the minds and hearts of the good people of Illyria.
The Fall in the House of TDF
Unfortunately, I feel the need to start this issue of the IllyQuill with something somber and serious. The Dragon Forest has become a victim of deforestation. Allegedly, from multiple confidential yet trustworthy sources, an April Fools joke went terribly awry. On April 1st, Geshep, the leader of TDF, had changed the name of the alliance to “SHART” for an April Fools Day joke. He changed the Alliance info page, added pictures, etc. It was funny, and well-planned. This scribe enjoyed witnessing it, and even let out an audible chuckle. However, things took a turn. A certain player (who I will not name, but he knows who he is, as do most of my readers) made an alliance, took the TDF name, and changed his name to Geshep. (notice the period). The actual Geshep, already being overwhelmed with the previous drama in Illyriad took that as his cue to leave. It’s very unfortunate, and he will be terribly missed by many. Before this “final straw” there had already been drama regarding another TDF leader and a miscommunication (see previous article from March). The timing of these events, being back-to-back, is quite unfortunate, and it has drained the numbers of the TDF crew, and caused more than a few players to abandon. It was almost as if TDF had a shellfish allergy, and someone snuck some crab into a shared entrée, and withheld the epinephrine.
Copious Copepods
Speaking of small crustaceans, it seems as though some players may be trying to make up for their inadequacies by putting other players down. Notably, a former leader of TDF is being blamed for not only Geshep leaving, but another player as well. This writer has it on impeccable authority that this is propaganda. It presents that after Geshep left, BuhLikesNachos was left “holding the reins” of TDF. Per my source, BuhLikesNachos was “upset, disheartened, mad and unhappy. We talked a few times but he just wasn’t into the game anymore. I log on one day to see him sending me a bunch of stuff. I knew then he was about to abandon… I offered to sit him for a while so he could walk away. He [wouldn’t] respond to any of [my mails]. Then the morning of the 11th I log on to see he’s online and he is sending me more stuff. He sends me a mail and while I’m responding he abandons. He was a good friend and ally in this game and he will be missed very much.” Other players, who were not in TDF and obviously do not wish to take the blame for issues they have helped cause, are blaming it on Fiona leaving, and saying that the downfall of TDF is entirely the fault of the newly formed alliance, BRUTE, who was made up of a lot of former TDF members, Fiona included. They are saying that this was planned and some sort of mutiny, instead of looking in the mirror and seeing that their toxicity has contributed at least 2 helpful people to leave our realm. To me, knowing all of the information that I do, the downfall of TDF resembles a case of the Cymothoa exigua (tongue-eating louse) that attaches to the host’s tongue and slowly kills it. However, the lice are the parties that have been placing the blame on others instead of where it truly lies – on their own slimy shoulders.
The End of the Plains Meta?
As detailed in the most recent Dev update on the forums (https://forum.illyriad.co.uk/topic11263_post112772.html#112772) the “plains meta” will be changing. To sum it up, very simply, cavalry has long been overpowered on plains terrain. This change will reduce that upper-hand and make the battles on plains a bit more level. This has caused quite a lot of discussion in the Global Chat, as well as Discord and the Forums. Some players are for it, some are asking for more changes. It will be interesting to see how this plays out when the change is implemented. One notable request, from Ashi in Discord is that “Knights need balancing by quadrupling their attack and doubling their speed.” Can’t blame one for trying 😉
Demon Invasion Update
To provide an update on the previously mentioned player-ran tournament, the Demon Invasion hosted by our own Mad God, Sheogorath, which runs until April 28th – the player with the highest kill/death ratio is Bert jr. Coincidentally, the player with the lowest kill/death ratio is also Bert jr. In first place is The Last Daughter, second is currently Nelsifer Muledwun, and third is Bertimus Prime. Other standings can be viewed here (Demon Invasion Tournament 2026 – Google Drive)
In closing – I want to stress that I am not getting much through this site in the ways of tips and secrets… the observations I make are from my eyes and ears only. As always, I try to be as unbiased as possible, but I do call things like I see them. The realm’s tabloid would benefit from more than one perspective, so I implore you to please submit tips through the option on the site. One day I hope to have a forum account to make it easier, but for now this is what I have.
Until next time,
— The IllyQuill 🪶
The Quilly 
The chilly is reporting that there is a heavy mix of bias included with “sources” which may indicate the quilly is directly involved in said drama without seeking the other sides evidence as they very well could have good knowledge. Are the sources just the quilly referring to themselves ?
We at chilly know several comments have been provided to the quilly on tdf regarding negative stuff such as cheaters, a tip that one would quit and they did several days later after admitting to it however this hit piece smear prodding one side comes out in defence of a particular player / alliance days after it happens instead of potentially hinting at more happenings just like with the weird “yuki” comment sent it.
I have impeccable authority that this news source has become propaganda. CHILL holds evidence that both Alien and Tucic, not having their names disclosed above, had decided to leave as TDF changed from what it used to be, the PVP like players changing the very alliance they led into tournaments for them to lead their own leaders to quit.
Secondly poor Buh quit due to thw fellow previous alliance leadership Fiona and Stuks comments, threatening war.
Lastly, there doesn’t appear to be any discussion around towns being stolen, the drama around who owns what, any sort of direction in conflict but rather masking and protecting one side, the SIN 2.0. The entire drama happening because everyone has been supposedly told by Tucic they own the towns. Who is lying and who isn’t ?
I’d love to see an article regarding DLORD, SMA, CHILL, TDF and oldguard all running about for abandoned members towns with threats of war on all sides.
So far Stuk’s threats have been fruitless to DLORD after they sieged and trained the town with over 2B gold in less than 24 hours owned by Tucic.
We at chilly hope to see more general comments made regarding any one side as there appears to be a personal level bias.
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Thank you for your input. By all means, please allow me to retort –
“We at chilly know several comments have been provided to the quilly on tdf regarding negative stuff such as cheaters, a tip that one would quit and they did several days later after admitting to it however this hit piece smear prodding one side comes out in defence of a particular player / alliance days after it happens instead of potentially hinting at more happenings just like with the weird “yuki” comment sent it.”
The original “yuki” submission came from an IP address in Ireland, which is strange given her location. The second (which I didn’t even mention here) also came from the same IP address. After reviewing both articles with the powers-that-be, it was agreed upon to not publish them. To me, it sounds like an Irish rat is trying to cause trouble… so perhaps one should read the definintion of the word propaganda.
The rest of your comment, well, you are entitled to your opinion. If you’d like me to write more about Chill, perhaps submit a tip. What happened with TDF is unfortunate, but as RoundRobin stated – they are licking their wounds and will push forward. I do not have eyes and ears in all alliance chats, and have REPEATEDLY asked for input on my articles. Things are ever changing, and I look forward to your continued support.
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One may add that revealing information on those who make tips may be a self defeating strategy considering it’s supposedly anonymous.
Counter intuitive and leaves even more suspicion if you’re biased or not. Secondly the second comment you refer to was made with a VPN so the location of said “same IP” seems slightly odd 😉
Lastly if actual living proof of players cheating is considered propaganda then I strike that as pretty odd.
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Quite some interesting times. Buh in contact with Dlord had requested that they capture Tucic’s large treasuries and return it to TDF – Brute made a similar offer, except planning to take half. Dlord captured the two large treasuries – and in a delicious turn of events after the massive military battles between them, with a ring of Chill blockades around one of the towns placed to interdict any Brute siege
In the underworld tourney Praetorian Guardsmen were awarded for perhaps the first time in a decade, making the series of unique unit awards quite emphatic. Bazoon built the entry form and was awarded a 5th place equiv prize along with Sheo. Last Daughter, the total champion, built a stat visualizer sheet which shockingly reveals that she had a 16.9 k/d ratio vs the runners up with less than 3. This is a testament to the power of fast elves, able to rack up kills with commander intensive elites, where the dwarves preferred to use bulk troops to enable more hits. There was an interesting tension between the elf ability to strike the elusive underworlders before they moved and for the dwarves to strike with quick training infantry, including on buildings where the elf cav or bow elites would not want to go
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Very interesting, da wolf. Do you mind if I quote a bit of this on my next article? I do so appreciate you.
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